I'm not important nor a government official but I just received this gem... This little piggy went to marketThis little piggy stayed at homeThis little piggy had roast beefThis little piggy had noneand this little piggy went "cough, sneeze" and the whole world's media went mad over the imminent destruction of the human race, and every journalist found out that they didn't have to do too much work if they just did "Find 'bird', replace with 'swine'" on all their saved articles from a year ago, er, all the way home.:D
Ever thought of becoming a journo?.... I think you've got it cracked.